Pilgrimage alone or in pairs?

This question is a very fundamental one, which cannot be answered in the same way for everyone. Because: there are two completely different ways to go on pilgrimage.

If you pack your rucksack and set off in the hope of finding answers, you should definitely go alone.

Those who go on a pilgrimage to learn something about themselves, perhaps to find more of themselves, should go alone. 

Those who want to overcome their fear of being alone with themselves should go alone. 

But also those who go on a pilgrimage to become a little more courageous, who want to face a challenge, who want to grow in a little adventure and prove to themselves that they can do more than they think they can, should definitely go on a pilgrimage alone.

Anyone who uses pilgrimage routes for long-distance hiking, who is primarily looking for a sporting challenge, and who wants to benefit from good infrastructure and clear signage, will usually find it better to walk with a companion. Staying in double rooms is always cheaper, and in the evening it’s nice to have someone to share a meal with and talk about the day.

But there’s another case as well: If you have physical limitations or if you set out on the path while dealing with depression, anxiety, or PTSD, it can be helpful to go with someone else so that you don’t overstrain yourself. That doesn’t mean you can’t go alone—but if being alone feels like too much, then don’t go alone.

Your companion in this case could be a friend or family member—provided they know how to support you well in your situation—or a professional.

If you’d like to know more about how I can accompany you on the Camino de Santiago, take a look at my page on pilgrimage guidance.

Nobody has to be afraid of getting lonely on the way. Even if you are rather introverted, you will always find company as a solo pilgrim. I have always experienced pilgrims (whether hostel sleepers or hotel sleepers) as open-minded people.

It is precisely because so many are on their way alone that in the evening they quickly form loose groups that meet in ever new constellations at the various destinations, depending on the individual stage length. If you know beforehand that you would like to make contacts, you should take this into account when planning your trip and choose times and routes that are not too quiet.

Moreover, we live in a time in which it is possible to keep in touch with friends and families at home from anywhere at any time. So even if you think all other pilgrims are stupid and prefer to keep to yourself – you are not in a Tibetan monastery without mobile phone reception.

I don’t find it at all reprehensible to escape the pilgrim community and do one’s own thing. Not getting to know anyone, preferably not even seeing other pilgrims. Everyone should use the way for himself in the way that is right for him. And especially when you go hiking in order to be able to deal with yourself in peace, it can be very helpful to avoid human contact as much as possible.

The best way to do this, of course, is to travel at less popular times. For the Portuguese Way of St. James, the less frequented coastal variant is also recommended.

The time of day at which you set off on your hike also plays a decisive role: because hostel sleepers are thrown out of their hostels at unholy times, they are usually on the road very early. And because most of the starting points of the stages are the same for almost everyone, the number of fellow pilgrims is reduced enormously if you start at ten or eleven o’clock and arrive late at your destination. Or start from a different town.

For hotel pilgrims this is no problem, the hotel is reserved and waiting for you and the towns are usually so small that you can easily add some sightseeing, even if you arrive at 6 pm.

I recommend most pilgrims to walk the Camino de Santiago alone. The emotional and spiritual experience is more intense, and the chance of forming lifelong friendships is greater.

Pilgrimage with a companion is mainly for people who walk the Camino primarily for sporting reasons and are not so interested in personal growth. And, of course, for people with physical or psychological limitations who do not feel confident walking the Camino alone.